1. This is never going to end.
2. You mean our ability to shorten this Hell depends on other people’s common sense and goodwill? Ok, we’re fucked.
3. Time for banana bread again.
4. Thank God I can work from home.
5. THANK CHRIST I don’t have kids.
6. How long have I actually been in these clothes/when was the last time I took a shower? (Actually stop, look at self, calculate … ) Oh dear, three days. Ok, this needs some action. (This has only happened twice — DON’T JUDGE.)
7. I want to move to a non-extraditable country with beaches and good health care (opens savings account to further goal — because SERIOUSLY, AMERICA. WTF.)
8. Maybe if we groveled really hard, England would take us back.
9. I’m never wearing makeup/bra/proper pants again. This rocks.
10. This is never going to end.